Kick It Up a Notch!

I have always maintained that 50% of whatever you say is HOW you say it. And I live by that belief. Sarcasm, unkind truths said in jest, and negativity promote more of the same. Sometimes you have to ask yourself, 'Is there anything good that would happen as a result of saying......'? If not, keep it to yourself. I have occasionally said on one or two occasions,

"Now, that's a comment that I may have thought in my head, but I would have decided to keep it there. Some things are left better unsaid!" You know, sometimes it is a matter of habit, and people are not consciously aware of how their words affect someone's state of mind, and then it gets carried on even further...like a domino effect.
Where am I going with this? It is a fact that I have complimented a person, often a stranger, because ...why not? Last week at the RSVP [Retired AND Senior Volunteers] Luncheon at The Holiday Inn, there was a gentleman playing a keyboard as background music as the 300 people found a seat and awaited the opening remarks. Many attendees were relatively oblivious, and didn't really 'hear' it because their focus was on the 'celebratory occasion' in progress. When the luncheon was over, my exit path led me right by the [75+] year musician who was packing up his music. So I stepped up to him and said,

"I really enjoyed your music."

A big smile lit up his face as he said, "Thank you very much."

I am not sharing this because I want any praise for being complimentary. I share it in an effort to light a few candles for people to say aloud what you may be thinking if it will bring on good will to someone.

Last week as I was pushing my [loaded] cart out of the grocery store, there was a 'Helping Hands" employee pushing carts back into the lobby. He looked at me and said,

"Would you like some help with that?"

"Sure. Thanks, that would be great!"

We chatted as I popped the hatchback on the van, and he said his day was just beginning and he was working two jobs. He lifted all of the bags into my car with a smile and a "Have a nice day!'

When at home and the groceries put away, I called the store to pay my compliment [forward] to management. A very friendly voice told me, "

"That's what is supposed to be happening and we appreciate hearing when it is happening. Thank you for calling and I'll be sure to make a note of it as there is an employee reward plan."

It took one minute to recognize and acknowledge a positive act of kindness regardless of the fact that it was an expected part of someone's job. I thought to myself...why don't I make that phonecall or 'on the spot' compliment to management more often? I know that they get many complaints, and the manager was pleasantly surprised to hear something good.

So, I pass it along in an effort to 'plant the seed' and germinate more examples,

"Say something positive." Let's 'reverse ' the customer service interaction from 'complaints to compliments.'

I would love to hear your comments of how you joined the wave. How were you able to pass it along? I welcome your ideas.

Peace Be With You!

It is New Year's Eve and it's already been memorable, for sure!!

While my Christmas gift to my son was a bonafide homerun, my Christmas surprise for my brother was clearly 'out of the park'!

Paul is visiting from NJ and spending a couple of days with Mom and me. Since Flo has moved in with me after her stroke, my brother has made the six hour trip many times, and each time he has made a pitch to take Mom to church. She, however, resists these efforts because of her wheelchair self-consciousness. Being out in public is not on her agenda, and at 97 her vote trumps all others.

A good friend of mine works in the parish rectory and told me that the pastor, a much loved priest and friend, has occasionally said Mass in people's homes. I asked her to inquire what the odds were that Father would be able to come to my house and say Mass while my brother was in town. The window of opportunity was small considering Paul's scheduled visit and Father's schedule and the New Year's Celebrations and activities. My holiday gift bag to Paul had some exotic soups which I was sure that he would like. And then I told him to look again because there was something else in the bag. Watching his face was fun, fun, fun...as he read that New Year's Eve Mass would be at 6PM at my house with our Mom.

At 6PM, Mass was held in my living room and it was truly a special event for my brother, my mother, and me. [The remaining trio of my immediate family!] It was snowing wildly, and with the colorful holiday lights as a background and Gracie [Amazing Grace...poodle extraordinaire] stretched right out in front of the 'altar', I'm thinking that is about as unique as you can get!

For a part of the service, as I sat next to my mom, I was fearful that she was going to 'leave us' right there in the presence of the priest. He told her that it wouldn't necessarily be a bad time because he could also give her the sacrament formerly known as 'the last rites'. As nervous and/or as pious as she looked, all was well. We even had the benefit of a general confession and absolution before the service.

So, Paul got to attend Mass with Flo as they had every Sunday when she used to spend weekends with him[before the stroke], Flo attended her first Mass since April '07 and didn't have to be seen out in public in her wheelchair, and I was treated to an 'Our Father' with everyone holding hands...in the comfort of my living room...priceless.

It was good. And I am thankful. God bless Father Dennis...and Marg.

Veteran's Day

My Uncle Freddie and Uncle Jack were in WW2 along with the many who served. But these are two faces that I knew and loved.

My brother Paul served in the Air Force. My brother Tommy served in the Navy.

My husband served in the Army. My good friend Chuck served in the Marines.

My high school pal Joe served in the Navy.

My son's roommate served in the Coast Guard.

I know and pray for a cousin Christopher and Lora's son Mickey who are in Iraq now.

I have had former students who have served, and I'm sure that there are many now, too.

God bless all of our service people...past, present, and future...and keep them safe.

I can't grasp war. I can't watch movies about war. I remember the visual images forever.

So, I honor all Veteran's on this day as well as their families. Because even when it's over, it isn't over for them.

I pray for a day when the world can...

Glad all over...

I just finished Part 2 of the AARP Safe Driving Instructing, and it was another successful venture. It is always fun to watch people come together and share stories about driving. Without having to be best friends, there is a certain affirmation in someone seconding your opinion about traffic, the absence of appropriate turn signals, and let us not forget the rudeness of other drivers. I should have given out gold, silver, and bronze ribbons for laughter inducing remarks! Instead of only those 3 awards, I had a vase full of glads[gladiolas] and everyone got to take one home. It was my way of telling them about the value of taking some time to smell the flowers, but also find something to be 'glad' about. Get it?

I'm glad that my mom receives such joy from my dog. It's a mutual admiration win/win thing! To hear Flo say,"You're such a good girl...You have such beautiful eyes...I love you, sweetheart...[I must remind you that she is talking about the dog, not me!!]

I'm glad that she is enjoying the birds and flowers. She tells me,"You have such good scenery here."

I'm glad that we get to laugh together.

It just makes you wonder.

I was paying bills, and trying to get some stuff done that I have put off. While I was outside staking my tomato plants[!!], word came that there was a tornado warning. Let me first say that a tornado in central NY is relatively rare. The sky was dark, and trees were swaying bigtime!!

So I came inside and there were all kinds of 'storm team forecasts' happening. It always amazes me how the weather people can pretty much predict what time the impending danger will arrive in each town. And they are accurate more times than not.

We got wind, rain, thunder,...

Later on in the day, I was calling in a book order for a friend 'cause I'm retired and she's still sweatin' with the kiddies. After placing the order, I was chatting with Patricia [the woman on the phone ]and I asked her where [what state] she was in, and what kind of weather she was having.

Missouri...in the center of the country.

Patricia then told me that she was so happy that they were able to get a roof on her house today. She and her three dogs had huddled in the central hallway of the house while a tornado ripped through the area. Her roof had been blown off, there were 37 trees down in her front yard, and she mentioned that the land in the back was now 'toothpicks.' There were eight of her neighbors who lost their entire house. Think about it.

Patricia is happy to be alive, and shared that she will never forget the loud, constant, roaring sound of the tornado. Or the devastation.

On the news, there were videos of entire houses being washed into a river. And many rivers are on the verge of overflowing...dams and levees at breaking points...worst scenario in many

years.

So...count your blessings and say a prayer for all of the people in crisis.

Things are scary for many, many folks.

Back in Bloom...or Bloomin Unbelievable: Tinkerbell's Recovery

Great news! Awesome...literally!!

No longer fading away.

Hour by hour, and day by day- Flo continues to improve. She's talking, and walking, and eating cookies with a smile and a twinkle in her eye.

Oh, to have the faith that if we clap our hands together loud enough.. Tinkerbell will come back to life.

I wasn't really believing that an [unknown] bladder infection could wreak the havoc that it did. Well, call me Thomas... 'cause I have now seen the light and I believe it!

Ain't life grand! Florence continues to play her trump card. Rock on, Mom.

[By the way, she has the rocker guy on American Idol in our pool. David Cook is getting rave reviews. Mom just wants him to get a haircut...and win, of course...so that she can collect the money.]